That’s where I’m going, along with those people who talk at the theater and child molesters and I’ll tell you why…<\/p>\n
We parked near the garden center at Walmart and walked in the doors. Just inside the door there lay a beautiful, dazed little bird on its back. It had apparently slammed into the sliding door and it looked like its life was slowly ebbing away. <\/p>\n
My daughter gasped loudly and said, ‘There’s a bird on the floor!” and two sales associates rushed over to see – each women; each one’s heart breaking just a little to see this sad little bird die from a wind gust it couldn’t handle.<\/p>\n
It’s tail moved slowly back and forth and its eyes were wide open in a kind of glazed astonishment. My daughter and I began to walk away, not wanting to witness its final moments.<\/p>\n
As we made our way into the main store, I blurted out, “‘E’s not dead, ‘E’s PINING.”<\/p>\n
My daughter burst out with a guffaw that echoed around the huge garden area and then immediately clamped both hands over her mouth as if it was disrespectful.<\/p>\n
I looked at her in horror.<\/p>\n
“Oh now I’m definitely going to hell.”<\/p>\n
She replied, “We’re both going anyway Mom. We read Harry Potter.”<\/p>\n
“Oh yeah.”<\/p>\n
And then we carried on with the rest of the dead parrot skit \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
That’s where I’m going, along with those people who talk at the theater and child molesters and I’ll tell you why… We parked near the garden center at Walmart and…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/259"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=259"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/259\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=259"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=259"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=259"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}