{"id":381,"date":"2008-04-09T16:13:00","date_gmt":"2008-04-09T21:13:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/?p=381"},"modified":"2008-05-15T09:21:05","modified_gmt":"2008-05-15T14:21:05","slug":"i-am-carmexs-bitch","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/2008\/04\/09\/i-am-carmexs-bitch\/","title":{"rendered":"I am Carmex&#8217;s Bitch"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Someone wrote a little ficlet talking about Carmex and how they didn&#8217;t know much about it. So I left this comment:<\/p>\n<p>Carmex is like crack. Goes on so smooth and warm. And then it tingles delightfully and smells so spicy. After a few moments of comforting warmth, a cool sensation spreads over your lips like a soothing mist that protects you from the evils of chapped skin and leaves you with a luscious, soft mouth just waiting to be kissed.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m Melia. I am Carmex\u2019s slave.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Someone wrote a little ficlet talking about Carmex and how they didn&#8217;t know much about it. So I left this comment: Carmex is like crack. Goes on so smooth and&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[38],"tags":[57],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/381"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=381"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/381\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=381"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=381"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ukmelia.com\/ridiculousthoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=381"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}