I was in a meeting the other day with both bosses and the rest of the department and one of the bosses said we should start the meeting with a little icebreaker. I thought to myself, ‘Whatever…’ We’re a small department, we all know each other, there’s no ice to break, but ok. Anyway, he says we should tell one thing about ourselves that was false, and one thing about us that’s true.

It’s so much easier to think up the false stuff 🙂

So my turn comes around and I say my two things and my Big Boss turns to me and says “You’ve had such a wild life, I’m not sure what to believe.” To this day her comment stuck with me. Have I had a wild life? I never thought my life was particularly outrageous. I’ve done some stupid things. Done some cool things. Bad things have happened to me, but so have some good. I think I did have a bit of a wild and crazy youth – where I did a LOT of stupid things. But I had fun.

I don’t know… It just seems like my life right now is plain. That’s a good word for it. Plain. This is dangerous for me, when I start to realize my life is plain. This is when I decide to up sticks and move half-way around the world. Maybe I should just rearrange my furniture and call it good because I can’t afford to move away from my life right now.

The other day I told someone I was pretty much resigned to remaining in Nebraska, at least until my daughter graduates from high school, which is a good six years from now. I was actually starting to feel settled here, if not content. Now the thought of staying here for six years seems like a jail sentence. I can’t make anything exciting happen here. I’ve given up trying and convinced myself that it’s not so bad. And truly, it’s NOT as bad as I sometimes make it out to be. I like my job, my coworkers, for the most part, are friendly and fun…

Ohhh man. I didn’t mean for this to be a moaning blog. I was actually just thinking about the things I’ve done or seen that makes people think I have a wild life. I guess maybe my definition of a wild life is a bit different from other people’s.

Ok so I’m becoming more and more impressed with Blogger’s capabilities. Now I can have titles. Nifty 🙂 Problem is I can’t think of a title first before the blog – usually. Oh well, minor inconvenience.

So I’m getting sucked further and further into my fixation on Kiefer Sutherland. *sigh* I don’t know what my damn problem is. Maybe it’s just hormones. I blame the internet mostly. Before I got online, I’d see a flick and think ‘oh yeah, he’s hot.’ and that would be the end of it. Maybe I’d have a sex dream or two involving said actor deciding he couldn’t live without me *grin* and well, that would pretty much be the end of it. These days, I have far too much access to archived interviews, trailers, movie updates, interviews other obsessed fans made of when they appeared on Leno and dumped online to feed my craving. I waste ages trying to delve a little bit into what makes these guys tick.

Believe me I feel incredibly silly talking about this. I don’t like to let people see how weird I am but I’ve got a blog and I’m gonna use it. I want this to be a no-holds-barred journal so there you go. I… am a weirdo. Anyway, getting back to Kiefer… I can’t sum him up. I, of course, don’t know him as a person and never will really, all I know about him is his work and the articles I’ve read. No way does that give me any true insight to what he, or any other celeb is like as a plain old human being. So I think a lot of my attraction to him is based on the parts he’s played. Same with the other 2 or 3 actors I get like this about. I like stories about tortured individuals involved in some kind of struggle – mental or physical. Kiefer happens to play a lot of those. I find it fascinating that in one film he can exude pure evil like in Eye for an Eye where he plays a rapist and in another film play an abused young man who’s so traumatised that he can’t speak as in ‘Trapped in Silence’. Amazing. Maybe I simply admire the talent. Maybe I’m just letting my inner teenie out for a stroll. It’s hard to say. I’m sitting here writing this, feeling like such a dweeb and yet also feeling like I have to explain why I’m a dweeb.

Actually I’ve been wondering who the next little obsession was going to be. That’s how it works you see, I get hooked on one from seeing a film and then stupid me gets online and starts reading about the actor, or at least about the film that got me hooked and it just snowballs from there. With Kiefer it was a little different as I’d actually been a fan of his since Lost Boys. In fact, I can remember when that came out because my friends and I were so chuffed that it was filmed in nearby Santa Cruz. Half of the opening scenes were like seeing my home on the big screen 🙂 Anyway at the time I was big on vampires and into Anne Rice goth-y stuff, so naturally I was completely *phwoar* over Kiefer’s vampire. He was very yum.

So now that he’s on 24, I find myself back into Kiefer-dom. It’s not a bad place to be really 🙂

Right so.. Summing up, I am really just a hormonal teenager with the hots for some actor. I am just a heartbeat away from creating a fansite, and I have Jack Bauer as my desktop theme. *sigh*